Will Shriner Quote – My Grandfather Killed the Passengers in His Car

“I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather….Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.” – Will Shriner

Les Dawson Quote – Beating my Mother-In-Law

“I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbor said, ‘Are you going to help?’ I said, ‘No, six should be enough.'” – Les Dawson

Phyllis Diller Quote – Runaway Children

“Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.” – Phyllis Diller

Groucho Marx Quote – Disappointment With Children

“I married your mother because I wanted children. Imagine my disappointment when you came along.” – Groucho Marx

Joan Rivers Quote – Unwanted as a Child

“I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.” – Joan Rivers